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Sunday, November 27, 2011

Insert foot into mouth and chew


Recently I dealt with an extremely rude and thoughtless human being.  One of my regular pharmacists is on vacation and thus I have had a week of unfamiliar faces filling in.  One of these fillers isn't so unfamiliar. I have worked with her three or four times a year for the past three years.  Not to long ago I ran into her outside of my store and brought her up to speed on operation baby, so it wasn't surprising that her first question when I came in what about how the IVF was going. What was surprising was her complete and utter lack of good judgment in her next comment. 

Picture this short, loud, and almost 30 year old woman pretended to listen as I explained in a brief couple of sentences what our timeline is.  She nods impatiently and then launched into a statement that can only be described as rude and thoughtless.  "Would it upset you if I said I was pregnant!?" Insert big shit eating grin.  What a bitch!  I understand being excited about a little one, I don't understand the apparent need to try and make me feel like shit.  I wasn’t about to let her see how much her statement hurt me, so I answered, “No, of course not,” with a sincerity I didn’t feel.

Do I understand that my fertility challenges aren’t her fault?  Yes.  Do I understand that people will not stop getting pregnant just because I haven’t been able to?  Yes.  Do I feel the sting with others around me seemingly get pregnant just by looking at a penis?  Yes.  And do I resent it when a woman presents her good news to me with the subtly of a shotgun?  Why, yes I do.  I have made it through several pregnancy announcements without wanting to deck the woman, but this presentation, this “in your face you infertile chick, I’m better than you” na-na-nah-bo-boo approach left my palms itching with the urge to slap the bitch.  But I resisted the urge and tried to remind myself that this particular woman has no brain to mouth filter.

She then spent the next three hours telling me about all of her pregnancy symptoms.  From her sudden fondness for bagels to her aversion to Alfredo, from her slightly crampy tummy to her inability to touch her toes anymore, from her frequent cries to her irrational anger, and from her tender breasts to her increased cup size. Yup. I got all these details and more.  Then I asked a question, how far along she was.  I had a hard time not laughing my ass off when she said five weeks.  Five fucking weeks and she would have you believe that she has experienced every symptom imaginable. 

I asked if she had made the big announcement.  She has not told anyone but her husband and her sister.  So why then am I lucky enough to have her joyful news rubbed into my raw nerves?  It turns out she’s having some problems with her progesterone levels and she knows how much research I’ve done of fertility challenges so she wanted to pick my brain.  Unfortunately I don’t know that much about progesterone levels, only that a level too low can cause a miscarriage and that it’s normally treated with progesterone oil injections, progesterone suppositories, or Prometrium taken orally or inserted vaginally.  She is using the latter vaginally so I had no new information for her.

I can’t imagine what she must feel like, to be so close to one of her dreams but teetering on the verge of losing it.  Terrifying.  Rudeness aside, I’ll be praying for her and her precious little one.

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